Why your New Years Resolutions are setting you up for failure…

New year.
The fresh start to top them all.

Don’t get me wrong — I love a reset. I’m all for a clean page, a deep breath, and the feeling that something new is possible. But with every New Year that passes, I get more and more fed up with the whole “New Year, New Me” spiel.

Let’s be honest — it usually goes something like this:

You’ve just come out of Christmas running on 90% red wine and 10% mince pies. Your jeans feel tight, your energy is low, and the thought of another late night makes you feel mildly unwell. So naturally, the grand plan is born:

Exercise more.
Eat less.
Be better.

And for a week or two, it works. You’re motivated. Fired up. Feeling good.

Until mid-January hits. It’s cold. It’s dark. There’s nowhere to go and nothing to do. Suddenly the idea of a takeaway on the sofa with a box of chocolates sounds… comforting. More than comforting - Necessary!

And this is the point where most resolutions fall off and get forgotten.

Not because you’re lazy or undisciplined — but because we load far too much pressure onto the start of the year. We create endless lists of everything we want to change, improve, fix or overhaul… and in doing so, we set ourselves up for failure before we’ve even begun.

So what if we did this differently?

What If You Chose Something That Actually Mattered?

Instead of an ambitious list of “shoulds”, what if you focused on one thing that genuinely meant something?

Take a moment and look back at last year — not to judge it, but to understand it.

What did you struggle with?
Where did things feel heavy or hard?

Maybe there was an element of your parenting you wish had felt calmer or more connected.
Maybe you’d hoped to show up differently for your partner.
Maybe — and this one is probably the most common and the worst — you wish you’d spoken to yourself with more kindness, patience or compassion.

These aren’t surface-level goals. These are the things that shape how life actually feels day to day.

Or maybe it’s something practical but meaningful:
Visiting family more.
Protecting your energy better.
Creating space for yourself without guilt.

Ask yourself this:

If I were looking back at the end of this year, what is one thing I’d be proud to say I intentionally worked on?

It doesnt have to be something dramatic, huge or perfect. It has to be something real. Doable. Something that can start small and become part of your day to day until its part of the norm and gets bigger and built on, rather than an empty forgotten promise to yourself which leaves you feeling like youve failed.

Real change that matters and makes us feel good as mums doesnt come with turn g your life into a slog on January 1st. It comes from recognizing what matters and choosing even just 1 thing. 1 thing to stay consistent with, to show up for and to feel it out.

You are wonderful just as you are, you dont need to change into a new person, you just need to understand and connect with yourself again and tweak or change the things that matter to you now.

on 3oth January, I am hosting a free online workshop for mums where I will be guiding you through intentional goal setting. I would love yu to join me!